Monday, June 14, 2010

Dream-Tranny Juggalette

Since I cannot decide whether to go scrupulous detail or "nutshell" on this one, I will just default to nutshell.

The dream starts with the biggest racist at my job rolling up in his locomotive-like pickup truck and asking me if I want to go to a carnival. I comply. This truck is so fucking big that half the trailer park is in his damn crew cab. Big Racist comments that this is going to be the trashiest redneck carnival ever.

We pull up to an old strip mall where a book store has taken shop from an old converted video rental store. They have big signs up that say "ICP TODAY!" "FREE FOOD!" The truck unloads as the gathered white trash flocks to go meet Insane Clown Posse. One kid laments the fact that the only free food is Reese's Pieces and that there "isn't even any Faygo."

As if my subconscious mind hasn't shit on me enough at this point, it goes on to decide that I am not properly attired for the event, so I cross dress as a Juggalette to go get autographs. My outfit? A green wig, clown facepaint, knee high boots, and a towel wrapped around me as a dress. (As if the towel-dress wasn't bad enough, I had made it purposely short and wasn't wearing underwear to..."entice" people...I know...)

There was only two minor subplots. One is where I get all "pro-juggalo" at the shop-keeper for overcharging the kids dressed like punks for books (yes, they were buying books...I don't know). The other was that apparently a prominent feminist author was having a book signing in that shop the same day. Lucky her.