Wednesday, December 16, 2009


I think I have had enough cold medicine today. I am going to turn down the internet for a little bit.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

A Tale of Two Girls

No, not these two girls. I have no idea who they are.

I am not sure what made these memories surface today. It is possible that, upon reflecting on my perspective on violence towards women, that these two independent interactions with females from over 20 years ago could have somehow shaped my present attitude on the subject could have some merit.

Before I begin the two brief tales, I want to summarize a little background about myself, two points specifically:

  1. As a youngster, and to a lesser extent to this day, I was very socially awkward and naive. In fact, I was naive to the point of ignorance. If it wasn't for my hyperactive friend in junior high, I may have been unaware of certain underpinnings of society well into my 20s.
  2. Growing up, my dad only ever told about two things you NEVER do as a man: Point a gun at another human being, and hit a woman. In fact, he probably emphasized the part about hitting women a lot more than not shooting people. It's ironic, after my mom and dad split, my mom got into an abusive relationship, and before my stepmother met my dad she had been in an abusive relationship. So, despite my naivety, I had seen since a young age many different aspects of females being abused.
Now, unto the tales.

The Girl That Kicked Me In The Nuts

There is not a whole lot to tell here. There was a girl that had been at my school for a couple of years at this point. We were in 5th grade, and maybe had a class or two together. The only social contact we ever had was the day I was standing in front of my locker, I dropped something, bent over to pick it up, and she kicked me in the nuts from behind. Hard.

I hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. The weird thing is, I looked at her, and she like stood over me a few seconds before walking off with this bizarre, unmoving mask-like expression on her face.

I never told anyone about it. The subject was never approached in any aspect. I was in school with this girl for seven more years, and even still see her in town from time to time. Even though I have long since put the physical and emotional pain of the incident behind me, I have never been able to reconcile in my mind why she would have done that.

There were times I was angry, and wanted retribution. However, the teachings of my father strictly guided me away from harming women. I had to learn to let it go. I had been victimized by a 12 year old girl, and I had to just live with it.

The Girl and the Two Little Bullies

Again in fifth grade, there was another girl I knew. I knew her better than the first girl, but still did not know her well. Oddly enough, both of these girls shared some similar characteristics: neither of them were particularly attractive, both were very skinny (though girl 1 was much taller than girl 2), they both came from low income families (the term "white trash" could be applicable), and neither were particularly well educated. I don't mean any of that as a put down on either girl, it was just the reality of their situation.

Now, the gigantic difference between the two was that girl 1 was moody and "exclusive/cliquish". Girl 2 was friendly, and even though I was scared to death of girls until the age of about, oh, 20, she was one of the few that I talked to. Even though she may have been "simple", she was gentle and kind.

Unfortunately, arrogant little pricks can look at attributes like this in a female and use it to exploit them. Case in point, one day after school I was sitting alone at the top of the "big slide" in the playground (I would often go up there and sit by myself, sometimes until dark, after school just to be alone). I could see most of the school and playground from that perch. This day, I noticed two younger boys talking to girl 2. As I watched a short while longer, it was obvious they were upsetting her and teasing her (not surprising being that the boys in question were a couple of little shits). She was starting to cry.

Even though I might talk tough online, I am not a brave, principled guy. I routinely let the world go on by, content to be left alone. On this day, though, something happened and I felt compelled to intervene. I slid down the slide and walked over to the girl and the two boys (3rd graders). I asked her if the boys were bothering her and she nodded, weeping. I turned to the boys and plainly stated, "Go away and leave her alone."

Now, I don't know if they were feeling tough because there was two of them, or if my reputation as a pacifist preceded me, but the two little punks basically said, "Who is going to make us?" This is where I step even further out of my established parameters of social interactions with carbon-based life-forms...and lie to them. "You would do well to walk away now, I have been studying martial arts, including karate, and have no desire to to harm either of you." Yes, I was really that well spoken as a youngster, and yes my bluff worked. The boys left.

The girl thanked me and I offered to walk her home (she lived very close to my house). We talked about karate the whole time. I even found a stick and "karate chopped" it in two for her. She smiled and laughed the whole time.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Terminator: Salvation-Summary from a Terminator fanboy

(For no other reason than spite, this is what I see when pictures of Twilight are shown.)

I finally got around to watching Terminator: Salvation last weekend, I wanted to just put a few things down in writing about it, solely from the view of a Terminator fanboy. In other words, if you haven't seen all the Terminator movies, some of what I am talking about may not make sense because I am not going to give detailed background on every point.

First things first, I went into this movie with very low expectations. The director, McG, is a fucking asshat. Baseless assertion FTW! Furthermore, the previous movie (albeit a different creative team) was lackluster, in my opinion, and it's portrayal of John Connor sucked shit through a phallic straw. In short, I was not bracing myself to be "blown away" by this movie.

However, the movie ended up being not as eye-ball stabbing torturous as I feared. Luckily, even with as big of a cunt trumpet that McDouche is, he had a premise that was hard to fuck up, a decent cast (more on that later), and a good budget to throw at it. So, at this point, at least McFagtard didn't fuck this movie into the ground, like he does with his favourite pair of pajama footies.

I mentioned he had a decent cast, probably most notable being Christian Bale, Bryce Dallas Howard, Helena Bonham Carter, Sam Worthington (who did pretty good), Moon Bloodgod, and Anton Yeltsin (the saviour of the movie from an acting standpoint). Out of the main cast, I understood the Bloodgod character the least and found her totally irrelevant. I personally feel McWank gets hard by having pretty ethnic girls around, but whatever.

Easily the best, truest to lore, and happily received gift of the movie was Anton Yeltsin as a young Kyle Reese. If nothing else, Reese's spirit of survival and doing whatever it takes to live was captured, and that was really important to me. So many of the actors in this movie were so intent on being tense about the post-apocalyptic world and fighting the machines, but Yeltsin had a real laid back approach to his character that beat the pants off of everyone else. Nobody was more "comfortable in their shoes" than he was.

Giving credit where credit is due, the imagery and special effects of the movie were very well done, top to bottom. McRammalammadingdong must have a good location scout, because they did a great job of portraying a very desolate world. Furthermore, the technology of the "machines" in the movie was much more impressive than previous installments (and MUCH more believable).

Even though the dialogue didn't manage to suck major ass, the story and plotlines as a whole were pretty shitty. There were all of these little mini story arcs that just weren't prudent, worthwhile or logical. For instance, they carried over the red-headed love interest for John Connor from movie three. Apparently she is a doctor/scientist now and is pregnant (at least they avoided the vulnerable pregnant woman as a plot device) and she gets all weepy for John and shit like that and YAWN.

However, the most egregious fucking bullshit "sub-sub-sub-plot" had to be the pseudo-romance of the Bloodgod character with the Worthington character. BARFOLA! They basically use this as leverage to try to give trust and credibility to the Worthington character so he can help John Connor (Bale). However, it is rendered totally useless by the fact because no relationship whatsoever is developed between Bale and Bloodgod (so why the fuck will Connor care what she thinks about the guy?), and Connor doesn't end up trusting the Worthington character until they have a confrontation, anyway. BONG!!!

Not wanting to get to involved into any more plot spoilers, lets just say there are other...plot devices...that are rather erroneous (ie, random mute girl). Luckily they do not distract overtly from the main story arc.

Terminator fans should be pleased overall with the nods given to past movies, and they were actually worked in without being too cheesy/cornball. Perhaps my favourite was the boombox (it even looked like the boombox Connor had as a child!) blasting out Guns 'n Roses "You Could Be Mine" to lure one of the machine sentries. (Also, unrelated, but surprise "Alice In Chains" FTW!)

One little thing that was missing that would have personally brought a sense of completion into the Reese character for me was a tattoo. Let me explain. There is a rather iconic scene in the first Terminator movie where Reese describes to Sarah Connor about being captured by the machines, and he reveals a Nazi-like barcode tattoo on his forearm that they used to track him. Salvation goes as far as showing Reese being captured and imprisoned by the machines, but they never brand him with the tattoo. Is it a big deal? Probably not. Would I have really enjoyed it's inclusion? Tremendously.

In conclusion, Terminator: Salvation is not the weakest link in the chain of Terminator movies thus far. There were lots of interesting "sci-fi" components instilled that didn't subvert cherished Terminator canon, and at least one of the performers grabbed his character by the balls and put it to the camera. I would recommend this to any Terminator fan or casual sci-fi fan, but it might be a little blah to a general movie audience.