Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Worthless Dick Scum

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I admit I get some bizarre, guilty pleasure out of reading celebrity gossip. Why? I don't know. If I was forced to guess, I would say it is because I hate so many people, especially wealthy people that think they are pretty and important.

However, in my unfortunate grasping to get my fix, I have learned of "pseudo-celebrity" douchebag asswipes that infect our planet like little worthless fuckers, and I would have been better off never know of them and possibly being lobotomized to forget them.

So, even though I really have no one to blame but myself, I am going to be a hypocrite and blame WWTDD.com (well, and to a lesser extent, Filmdrunk) for exposing me to the following worthless leeches on humanity, whom I would never have known otherwise because I only watch football, MMA, and pro-wrestling on tv and virtually never go to movies:

  • Paris Hilton
  • Perez Hilton
  • Lindsay Lohan
  • Miley Cyrus
  • Lady Gaga
  • Rihanna
  • Chris Brown
  • Zac Efron
  • Jonas Brothers
  • Pete Wentz
  • Ashley/Jessica Simpson
  • That tubby little pregnant sister of Briney Spears'
  • Victoria Beckham
  • Lily Allen
  • Michael Bay (fuck his stupid ass)
  • Uwe Boll
  • Twilight and all the bullshit associated with it
  • Robert Pattinson
  • Kristen Stewart
  • Diablo Cody
  • Brooke Hogan
  • Nick Hogan
  • That Jon/Kate/8 ABOMINATION
  • Sienna Miller (what a cunt)
  • all of them dingleberry cuntfags from those shitty MMA movies (you are 130 lbs soaking wet, dickslap...OOOOO! SO INTIMIDATING! OH WHA AH AH AH! I TAKE SHITS BIGGER THAN YOU!)
  • GLARING OMISSION #1-Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt (talk about a couple of fucking worthless shits)
  • Carrie Prejean
  • Justin Bieber
I will add to this as I see fit. I hope all of the fucking dirtbag, bottom-feeding losers on this list get the same butthole disease that killed Michael Jackson! Baseless assertion FTW!


Stephanie said...

Also, all the spoiled rich kids from reality shows like The Hills. FUCK 'EM!!

jokERSWIld said...

You forgot Ryan Seacrest and the veritable horde of douchebaggery that is. . . American Idol.

Donk said...

Is that a yarmulke popping off that kid's head in the .gif?

Dirty Hairy said...

Oh yeah...and Mike...FUCK MIKE!

Anonymous said...

Some additions:

Rumer Willis

Ali Lohan

the younger siblings of the Jonas Brothers and Miley Cyrus

Basically the siblings/children of anyone famous who think they're entitled to being famous by proxy.

Dirty Hairy said...

Droid-Kinda like KFed?